There are now 200,000 stay at home dads in the UK. The number is growing and there are many reasons for this growth. Women of today have forged stronger careers with good income and they can often earn more than their partner. In the current fragile economic climate, many families are reorganising themselves so that the higher earning mother goes out to work and dad opts to stay at home rather than pay out for childcare.

With an increase in the number of redundancies, it may be that the decision is enforced rather than chosen. If dad gets made redundant and is unable to find another job, it may be easier for mum to try her luck in the work place instead.

Whatever the reason for changing the roles, it's important for couples to keep the lines of communication open and discuss all options. Dad may feel like he has let the family down and mum may feel anxious about returning to work, especially after a longer career break. It will take time to adjust to the new roles.

To help with your changing circumstances, here are a few points for couples to consider:

• Talk to each other and discuss options, the pros and cons and how you both feel. Be open and honest with each other.
• Focus on what's best for your family and not what other people think.
• Put yourself in your partner's shoes and understand how they might be feeling due to the changes they are making.
• Support each other to help with the adjustments.
• Seek advice online or at local groups from people who are in the same situation.
• Consider the impact on the children and depending on their ages, how you discuss the changes that are being made.
• Consider the skills you and your partner need and determine if you need to learn any new ones, to help in your new roles.
• Accept that it will take time to settle into your new roles. Both parents will have different ways of dealing with things. For example, it may be hard for mum to see how her partner is now keeping the house. Realise that there will be differences in the way things are done but that it can still work!

Stay at home dads face a completely new world. Having spent most of their life working with adults, it can seem strange and daunting to then spend most of the day with children. Spending time with other parents will be mostly mums and the lack of male companionship may seem odd and strange.

So mums, why not share the following points with would be stay at home dads, to help them settle in to their new roles:

• Don't worry about what other people think. Attitudes are changing, as reflected by the increasing number of men who choose to look after the children but there will be inevitable comments from family and friends as well as stay at home mums.
• Keep your sense of identity. Encourage stay at home dads to retain some of their original hobbies so that they aren't just "dad", but an individual in their own right.
• Keep a routine. This benefits the children but also helps dad in what he needs to do next!
• Go out and socialise. Getting out of the house and meeting new people, can help dads with possible feelings of inferiority at being at home all day but also a great way to share experiences.

To find out more about dealing with changes in your life and for help in creating a life that you love, visit www.horizonsregained.com